Monthly Archive for October, 2011

Ah, the little kid birthday party.

I admit (and forever apologize to Ruby for) requesting there be NO PRESENTS at her 3rd birthday celebration earlier this year. I’d never heard of such a thing, but it seemed like every birthday invitation we received included the ominous warning “No presents, please.”

I figured it was either a) an American thing, b) a Seattle thing, or c) a modern eco-friendly parenting thing. I didn’t want to fail on all fronts.

So here’s where I’m at with this.

At a recent birthday party for twins, the invitation said No Presents. I painstakingly made Ruby “make” cards instead. BUT EVERY OTHER PARENT BROUGHT PRESENTS. I was so apologetic as I slipped our two homemade cards in the mix. Did I miss the memo or something?

Who is making up these rules?

Now I have a problem. I bought a birthday present for an upcoming birthday before I read the fine print of the invitation. Yup, you guessed it. No presents, please.

What should I do with the gift? Bring it? Not bring it? Do I offend the parents either way? Are we supposed to bring a balloon or make a card when it’s “No Presents?”

I am totally failing to understand the subtext and innuendo of this request.

On another note, I forgot to bring cookies to Ruby’s preschool during her birthday week. Apparently I was supposed to do that.

I did miss that memo.

When it comes to food, I share everything with Ruby.

I can’t even pry open a box of cookies without Ruby running over and yelling that she wants some too. As a mother of two, I’ve pretty much given up eating any of my food (1) remotely warm, (2) not cut up into little pieces, and (3) all by myself.

Too often I’ve found myself sneaking off to have a snack, just so I don’t have to share with Ruby or explain to her why Mommy can have a chocolate-covered Pocky stick but she can’t. At 9 in the morning, or at night, or whenever, because those things rock and you can eat them all day. But that is a whole another rant.

Last night, as I started to prepare a post-dinner “dinner” of some instant noodles, I found myself saying, “Ruby, Mommy is not going to share this with you, okay? So don’t ask for any noodles.”

I felt horrid. Selfish. But damn those noodles tasted hot and I ate it all myself. AND IT FELT GOOD.

Then I started thinking about Ruby and how we as parents, always and to a point of ad nauseam, tell our kids to SHARE. With a younger sister, school, and play dates, the lesson of sharing is a daily one.

In the modern, passive aggressive, Dr Spock era of parenting, you are a terrible parent if you don’t do this, this, this, and that to make your child the most eco-friendly, politically aware, morally upright member of society, who shares.

I get that. Sure.

But seeing how I didn’t want to share sometimes, I totally get why Ruby doesn’t want to share sometimes.

How would you feel if someone CONSTANTLY told you to share EVERYTHING you had?

It’s human nature not to.

Because really, what if your friend popped by ALL THE TIME to “share” your car, “share” your clothes and electronic toys, “share” the contents of your alcohol cupboard?

Yah. See?