Memo To A Distracted Mom
Dude. Are you there? What’s the deal, man? Turning the air conditioner on when you meant to heat the car? Walking into the kitchen and forgetting what you were going to do? Locking up the house, strapping Ruby into her car seat, getting into the car, driving to the junction and then remembering you left the diaper bag at home? Going to the store for just one item and forgetting what it was?
Dude.
It’s the baby, isn’t it?
You ever ask “What if?”
Tim Kreider of The New York Times did in this very readable post about the choices we did – and by default didn’t – make in life.
Sure I’ve wondered.
I’ve wondered about Dot in the Alternative.
If Dot in the Here and Now is a stay-at-home mom, wife, part-time editor living in Seattle who hasn’t had a “date night” since July and cannot remember the last weekend she had that did not involve massive laundry and the picking up of toys; then Dot in the Alternative could very possibly be…anything else.
Roving correspondent. Bitchy editor. Happy Hour regular. Frequent Flyer. Noon waker. Singaporean trailblazer. Diaper Genie virgin.
Do I ask the question as an academic exercise to validate my life thus far, or do I ask the question as a desperate attempt at some amateur fantasy?
I don’t know.
Maybe there is a third possibility – Dot in the Next Five Minutes.
The Dot who takes a deep breath, looks at Jay sitting on the couch in the toy-strewn living room, hears a snoring Ruby, ignores her yet-to-be-edited work, takes another deep breath, and thinks, “What a lucky girl I am.”
Rated: Three Kleenex Blog Post
Two firsts happened today.
One, Ruby said her first sentence. (That I understood).
Two, Ruby went to school.
What’s a proud mom to do? Blog!
“I want bao bao.”
It is perhaps appropriate that Ruby the Bilingual Baby’s first sentence is in English and Mandarin. Jing the Nanny had taught her to say “bao bao,” a short form for “char sao bao,” or the barbecue pork buns she loved so much. So naturally, when Ruby wanted one today, she blurted, “I want bao bao.”
She got her bao bao.
Today was also Ruby’s first day of co-op, or co-operative. Eighteen kids, 18 parents, one teacher. Controlled mayhem. Ruby did pretty well, except for clean-up time when she refused to let go of a doll. She grooved to the sing-along, played with a few other toddlers, and hugged the teacher goodbye.
For reading to the end of the post, here’s your Bonus First.
Ruby gave me lip for the first time today. You be the judge.
Dot: Ruby, can you say bye-bye to Renzo?
Ruby: Yah.
Yah, she sure could say bye to Renzo, but not just then.
Oh how fast they grow.
(a) Somehow, they know ice-cream is a good, good thing.
(b) “No” is indeed one of the first words they say. And if they are especially eloquent, “No no no no no!”
(c) If it’s not “No,” it’s “More.”
(d) They copy everything you say. Quit swearing.
(e) Most toddlers these days have seen Youtube and operated a mouse.
(f) Their arms still barely reach over their heads.
(g) They cry on cue.
(h) Toddlers manipulate. Manipulate back.
(i) They get away with so much because they look so cute in their little clothes on little bodies with little eyes looking up at you with little mouths quivering and little fingers grasping your hands.
(j) They whine without saying a single word.
(k) They name their stuffed toys Bah Bi and Mi Mi.
(l) Be-ba is “teapot”, wa-wa is “water”, boot is “boot.”
(m) They do not know the difference between permanent Sharpies and washable markers.
(n) Beer bellies are adorable when you’re two and a half feet tall.
(o) When they are really, really tired, they can sleep in your arms, in the carseat, on the couch, on the carpet, and clutch random items ranging from plastic plates to a toothbrush.
(p) No matter what is happening around them, toddlers can focus on the littlest thing on the floor. More so if it is a piece of dried up cheese from three weeks ago.
(q) They point very well.
(r) They point and grunt even better.
(s) The realization that they have the ability to CHOOSE suddenly blows their minds. And that is why you may sometimes see Ruby in shoes with no socks. She hates socks.
(t) They can eat cookies, crackers, and all manner of crunchy junky goodness all day if you let them.
(u) There is no greater sound and action than hearing a little person yell your name and run to wrap their short arms around you at the end of the day.
If (a) to (t) is the price for (u), it’s a pretty good bargain every which way.
What does it mean if Ruby sits on the potty only if she has a keyboard in front of her?
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