Babies Biting Books: A Mathematical Conundrum

This is the reason I am hesitant to borrow baby books from the library.

I imagine the number of babies who have come and drooled before Ruby, divide it by the number of times she will read the book, multiply that by the odds of her chewing on said book, subtract my ability to ignore the statistical chance of cross contamination, and the result is “Get me Lysol, pronto!”