Monthly Archive for September, 2005

Organic Change

David Brooks of The New York Times wrote an interesting anecdote in his welcome message on his site. Brooks is the rare right-leaning voice in the Times. And somehow, these words struck me.

“Tom Wolfe was once asked what was the most important thing that’s happened in his lifetime. He said that was an easy one: Co-ed dorms were obviously the most important phenomenon of the 20th century.

What I think he meant by that joke is that for centuries co-ed dorms would have been unthinkable. And then suddenly, without much debate, they just happened at colleges all around the country.

They were a reminder that the most important changes in our society are not planned. They are not the ones organized by political leaders. They are the ones that happen organically, through some intellectual or cultural shift. They are the spontaneous result of millions of people consciously or unconsciously changing their attitudes or behaviors or mental frameworks.”

Nuptials

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Ah, the wonderful world of weddings. We’re going to Ty and Heather’s big day this Saturday. I don’t expect anything different from the usual white, the flowers, the overwhelmed families, the perma-smiles, the eating, the drinking, the toasting and the crying.

You just know someone is going to give advice to the happy couple in a speech. Someone else is going to get drunk. And someone else’s someone is going to give an embarrassing memory of either bride or groom.

Couples all over the world must have a collective memory of their wedding days. How different do they get? Not really. People go to great lengths to plan and individualize the event, but although the venue, menu, dress and speeches may vary, the schedule of events hardly change.

No one eats before the ceremony. No one kisses the bride while dancing down the aisle. Tradition is tradition is tradition.

So who planned humankind’s very first wedding? THAT must have been quite a headache. How did they know what to do? And in what order? It seems that everyone now is following the original playbook of “How to Plan a Wedding”.

I hope to be surprised this weekend. Frankly, I don’t know how the 100 T-shirts we printed of this design is going to go down.

Double Duty

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I saw a clip on TV the other day about “SPEPPER”. Salt and pepper in one shaker. As you wrap your mind and your tongue around this brilliant idea and name, think about all the other things you can do at the same time.

The inventors of Spepper talked about how convenient a single shaker was and how surprised they were to find out that no one had registered that idea before them. This is true. We are the convenient generation. I’m sure many people prefer to have their life organized in one location. Work, shop, eat and sleep within a one-block radius. Perhaps that will explain the popularity of certain self-contained neighborhoods.

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Spepper’s concept reminds me of Wallace and Gromit. Wallace had an invention that literally rolled him off his bed and prepared him for the day. He didn’t have a lift a finger.

Me? I enjoy the thought of a day spent running around doing random things. Makes life an adventure and just that slightly unpredictable. But if Spepper is any indication, we’re headed for more double-action words.

Shwash: Shower and wash dishes?
SyrupMeat: Eat syrup-filled pancakes with your sausage, cheese and egg? (This one floored me. Apparently, that’s what a MacDonald’s McGriddle is. Lord help us.)

Are we that lazy as a species? I always wondered how we evolved. I think all the earlier humans did the hard stuff, and now we’re finding ways to de-evolve.

Lights Out, Baby

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My poor Beetle had a headlight procedure the other day. She’d been one-eyed for a long time and I finally got her a replacement bulb. May she shine again.

4,000 Weeks And Counting

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Jay told me something the other day. He was trying to help me make a decision.

He was sitting at his computer one day, doing his work, and then it hit him that he would do it for the whole week, and before he knew it, Friday would roll around and the week would be over.

“So I calculated how many weeks I’d have,” he said. And based on 75 years of an average life span, he figured that he had 4,000 weeks in his life. “We have to stay motivated and stay happy and all these things in those weeks.”

“Is it worth it?” he had asked me.

Life’s decisions usually make themselves. What shall I eat today? Hmmm…hamburger looks good. What color do I paint on this wall? Hmmm…I’ve always liked pink.

For the harder ones, you need to take the courage to make the call, even if the decisions hurt others. It’s your life you have to live. And besides, I only have 4,000 and counting of those darned weeks. Thanks, Jay.

Don’t Ask How Long It Will Take

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So here’s an update because you asked. And here’s an update, even if you didn’t. It’s been quite a journey since we bought this house in January.

We’re finally living in the house. But as you can see, the insides aren’t exactly ready. Our current “big” project is the kitchen. (I use “big” loosely. There are millions of “littler” projects to complete at the house, mostly all ranked by importance according to “How Long Dot Can Live Without It”.)

So except for the countertop in the kitchen, we have almost everything ready to go, we just need to fit them all together.

But of course life isn’t so simple. And of course, people who invented appliances all happened not to have taken a class in “Instruction Booklet Writing”. They should put journalists in charge of that. At least we’ll make a nice story out of it, even if we didn’t understand it.

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And in other news, siding is going up! We actually have something that looks like the outside of our house. If anyone remembers, the bottom of the house used to look like it was wrapped in construction paper. Although I can name many other things still wrapped in construction paper, it feels good to tick this one off.

I cannot wait to see the light at the end of -this- tunnel.

My Dear Sir, That’s A Monocle

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When you are bored, when you’re drunk on someone else’s expensive Spanish wine, when you have nothing in your pocket except a random Hello Kitty thing of which its exact use is a mystery to you, then you create the Hello Kitty Monocle.

It was terribly funny when we first thought of it. Jay and I were giggling too hard and too loud at a nice fancy restuarant when I pulled it out and mimicked a British accent. (And why is it that I think only British use the monocle? It may have a lot to do with that Monopoly mascot, though the game is probably American.)
Continue reading ‘My Dear Sir, That’s A Monocle’

Say It Ain’t So

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So I always said I wouldn’t pay to read online. I have.

I subscribe to The Straits Times, no doubt the SECOND paper in the world to charge, after the Wall Street Journal. And they know schmucks like me cannot do without “news from home”, a.k.a. the latest political “missives from home”.

It was not an easy decision. A few weeks back, I signed up for the Straits Times kicking and screaming. It was definitely not for the editorials.

Now I’m faced with a different kind of decision. It’s the New York Times. This is the beginning of the end, folks. I am ashamed to say I cannot do without the ramblings of the self-important, but absolutely fabulous, essayists from the TimesSelect editorial team.

This new TimesSelect service allows readers who sign up now (For a discounted fee of US$39.95!) a chance to read what the Times is thinking. You get exclusive online access to their mostly highly-paid, liberal brains. Hallelujah.

And for the record, the Times is the only newspaper I will ever willingly pay for, and whose site is so comprehensive and engaging that it, with the Wall Street Journal, should be the only two newspapers allowed to charge for content. Straits Times, can you take a hint? (Also, can the Straits Times fix that damn overlapping glitch with the headlines on the right side of the screen that always happens when you first load up a story?)

As print newspapers all over the world struggle to remain relevant and viable in an increasingly electronic world, it is saddening to know that few people subscribe to actual newspapers anymore. Fewer, especially among the younger generation (I hate to malign an entire generation, but it’s 99% true), even know what it feels like to get stained fingers from reading a black-and-white newspaper.

I’m beating a dead horse here, I know. People want mini “news-lets”, not news. Who has the time, right? When you can read all the headlines while you sign on to your Yahoo mail; when you can listen to TV talking heads tell you how to think. I lament our visualized world.

But if the Times goes the way of “Credit Card, Please,” what does this mean for the rest of the smaller newspapers out there?

Say it ain’t so, Joe.

Boring Is

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Staring at this screen while your husband tries to get a signal outside our construction zone home.

One Man’s Guffaw Is…

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Another man’s polite giggle. There is no accounting for taste in comedy. I could be clapping and splitting my sides laughing while the people beside me are stone faced. You can’t please everyone.

Admittedly, the first group was ho-hum okay – Someone behind me blurted, “I want my money back” – but the second group had the audience laughing loudly. Although, still, with the exception of the couple beside me. I think they forgot they were attending a sketch comedy festival.

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Can you do a show about 70′s blue-collar renaissance? Apparently you can. Or, if you’re Seattle’s Flaming Box Of Stuff, you throw in references to weed, sex, hallucinations, Pink Floyd, disability, murder, and pull off a funny show.

I really really liked Flaming Box Of Stuff tonight.